The Memorial service for Matthew David Waller.
Will take place on Sunday July 7th Haworth Park, Dawson Drive, Kingston upon Hull, HU 67 DYa
Start at 16-00 ,short service will be followed by time to be with family and friends. Time to celebrate Matty's Life, share food and go forward renewed.
You are welcome to attend and remember Matthew.
Loved and missed. A gorgeous Soul.
Only a Boxer can understand the Boxing world and the whole process that began when the Boxer stepped into a gym.
Not the ring but the Gym. That the first and mainly most vital step. this begins the route. Follows Pain, blood, bruises, discomfort, sweat, hard task, long hours, loss of some social standing, test plus ending of some relationships.
Better the Maverick you are, more certainty to succeed. If you not had to go through this whole process cant see how understand the experience. But many feel because they Love the sport they get the picture, despite real image being distorted.
The first time see a square ring, this becomes hollow ground. Place of soiled, spilt blood, place of hurts, triumphs. New words become important. Although meaningless to others.
Ringcraft, gloved up, sparring, gum shields, no lo blows. Time out.
Smells, hard to explain Canvass sawdust smell. Despite daily cleaning it smells old. Musty.
Leather smell of `sweat stained`, sparring gloves.
Over done aftershave and talc, Sounds "3 minutes", Last 10, "knees up, on those ropes"
Sound of gloves hitting body and head. Silence. Wind in the ropes. Skipping. Grunts of shadow boxing.
That take a whole blog to explain, Shadow Boxing, yes your own shadow. lack of vanity as you box own image in many mirrors around Gym.
Rituals, Language, sounds, gatherings, resilience.
Discipline Hope, hurts, losing. Surviving. Art of skilled boxer. Cold night after session in the Boxers world. Walking home heavy headed. Unsure if this is sport. Friendship of those who understand that some blows cut you down. Some blows still hurt next day. Triumphs and pain. Friends who you've hit and hit you back. Every blow is felt.
Training, more that that, it's preparing you for LIFE.
In that time, l Recall Grandma W, struggling to make a way from poverty around her.
Borrowed £1, enough in 1963, help get her through weekend. Borrowed from, Father of mine who also had little. That impacted myself .When We,' My brothers and l', got older. We could afford plus were able to treat Grandma. We did.
Not sure, well sure really. That we did not understand that we were geographical poor, further our economic wellbeing was slight.
Something was just understood. We never sought money. We never sought richest. But got Values mostly come from that time, that place Those people
It All Affects. Now and here . Good stewardship. Useful resourcing. Sharing. Looking after others. Accepting when enough can be enough.
We know, all that heaven allows. Sometimes it only allows, insufficient to be 'yours'.
My illness came visited today, just hung around, remained. Today l feel so much wasted time, potentially got lost. Never to return. Curtains closed and quiet snores. Glance at clock then again slipped away. NO .Just For moments.
Plus so very much still to do, no kettle, no honey tea brew. Around late Afternoon the medicine arrived l stirred began to exist. Coughs, splutters, See My Heart LIFES engine, is faster giving up on me. I'm ill you see.
LIFE is hard some days are Diamond's some days are rusty.
That's all today from me.
Some things I`m just uncomfortable about, there are group same things occurring in society that many are intolerant off. Things like Vaping in general, but especially Vaping on public transport,
Such behaviour find unacceptable but also reflect on persons character.
Simply beleive that we can do better around others. Why Vape on a bus as example. Then why be rude, threatening and mock a simple request from another to stop the illegal behaviour. Why such an attitude how did it become the normal pattern. Driver smocking see no issue with this problem A fear factor also presented as reason for lack of intervention.
Dr Jordan B Peterson, well renowned Psychiatrists holds faith based values. Communicates about, ` sitting up straight, putting belongings away, tidying up own space.
Practical values that he argues can impact larger stuff going on in life internally. Deep internal issues are effected by how you, present you as an individual.
That's gets my juices flowing find myself in agreement.
Still unsure why some lack compassion, Grace, understanding and want all the attention on them.
Thunders rolling, rains very heavy, clouds are dark. Emptiness around plus it's bank holiday.
Life, passes and at pace the above image is from November 2008. Matthew introduced me to Orthonolgy, plus `Big Bang Theory`, and cathedrals. thank you son. Takes others to introduce `stuff`..use that word a lot. Issues , items, viewing, listening, Art, Faith all happens when encountering others, hear the experience they bring.
Laughter from the belly as Other person, watches favourite TV programme. Few weeks later its become something you watch ,share, discuss, encountered something.
Words spoken about Faith, God, Love, Jesus, Scripture...encounter occurs share, discussed, rejected, accepted..
Like the TV programme we have to be encountering Others, the lack of Others in our life, Lack of social mobility, Geographical poverty, can be a dispiriting experience.
We need to be moving around in presence of Others, encountering new even uncomfortable experiences so we can grow, further develop.
LIFE, that's all that's happening here.
Suppose when l confirm with you. `Who l am`..
Like some People ,l would argue that have personally been changed, not always clear in what ways by these spiritual adventures.
But like others confident they have happened. Something internal, well it happened. I felt only what could say was Gods presence. Felt inside of me. Confident heard voice of God say do it here, in this place, as one example.
I apologize because perhaps you don't want to hear this communication. Perhaps this l can understand, may feel the author ….well....bit unbalanced. Feel more aware of focus towards issues .Less concerned with stuff. That can distract.
It sounds ego chasing. Further felt more compassion towards you other people.
Less concerned about dwelling, their hygiene. Seen others differently.
Here's a bit of the rudder hitting the road...felt more aware of God via the holy spirit. That stays. Found myself seeking this awareness in areas, environment in other people. Look for meaning in song lyrics, Art, books, Films...believe that` The Divine through Holy Spirit`, can take many forms.
It's not a super spiritual issue. It's a humble discernment method for all accepting Jesus as Lord.
That's best way l can share my Spiritual part of who l am.
Still waiting for communication about a date. Then we can gather to say final goodbye to Matthew.
14th February 2024, little after 2 o'clock in the afternoon. We said farewell. Nature empty sometimes as l walk in places we often tracked.
Nevertheless, here's us both freezing at top of a mountain. Matty got that 'Dad bit embarrassed' look. I'm just freezing.
Loved and Missed son.
LIFE can appear cruel plus pointless. We still have to complete the circuit. Keep the faith. Be strong. Yes they are just words. Faith always test, more so when challenge appears huge. But with pain l say, "My soul doth magnify". See it now oh death different,God see death bigger,better then we can imagine. On that placed hope.
Words, platitudes,sayings,old wives tales, ramblings, But they still have truth contained. life still has to be lived.
Who am l. Health a factor, age a barrier, economic wellbeing plays key to schedule. Remains one of life's big questions.
Ask all of us to make informed thought through statement.
Where are you going? Malta always hope. But more than that. Life big questions also present great big banana skins.
Could be great record.
Oh Yeah Who are You?,
MONDAY.
FEEL S LIKE A MONDAY, EVEN WEATHER KNOWS ITS Monday.
Bank of course its Monday. paying bills. that's for Mondays. checking the washing Monday. Bus late, coffee grew cold, end of football season, computers are hard to book, weather becoming more overcast. l am walking in old town, its empty because that's what happens on a Monday anywhere in the world. Everyone knows about Mondays...but Fridays coming pretty quick. IS that song playing in your head.?
(Tell me why)
I don't like Mondays
(Tell me why)
I don't like Mondays
I wanna shoot the whole day down
The Telex machine is kept so clean
And it types to a waiting world
Her mother feels so shocked, father's world is rocked
And their thoughts turn to their own little girl
Sweet sixteen, ain't that peachy keen
Now it ain't so neat to admit defeat
They can see no reasons
'Cause there are no reasons
What reasons do you need, oh oh oh oh?
Not liking Mondays as a reason for doing somebody in is a bit strange.
Saturday and ignorance roams our streets.
Protestors in London are currently calling for an “intifada,” a violent uprising against Jews, during the same weekend that multiple Jews were attacked worldwide. No one is stepping up in Authority to explain ethics and discuss delima identify. Such rhetoric has consequences.
All words do. They travel along our emotional consequences, become lived. They become alive as we chant a mantra.
It shouldn’t take dead Jews, or blown up buses in Tavistock square on hot July day, for warnings about the normalization of antisemitism to be taken seriously. Kevin Waller @ spiritofthestreets
But worse my cup of tea shop .well it's not open. So sat in pub having a pint. Yeah me.
Day didn't get off to real good start. Yesterday was calmer. Troubled sometimes rolls in. Why.
Recovered. Now having cup of tea. Ice cream.
Where's the playground. Where the sandbox. What do we neglect. Now that l am all grown up and mature, how come something's appear so fearful.
Why has LIFE been hard...Road less travelled should have prepared myself. How come person, relationship's like getting off a fast fairground ride.
You need a hand to steady yourself. The carousel has stopped. The Golden horses are still. Ride felt like fun.
This playground is empty. Sure if you had stayed LIFE Would be so different. Freedom came for you like many.
When you accept, or just have to reluctantly allow another to leave. They then have to stand alone.
In making choice to leave, they also saying.." l know the way,"..."l can make it"..
Perhaps 'tough Love' ,means you have to inform them ..The puzzle that we never found an answer for still asks us, Darling, just what all the games were for, And here we stand in a empty playground. Silent.
Suppose journey sometimes has dark echo's with no learning, l kind of believe not everything here now, in this LIFE has answers.
There are Spiritual forces trying to trip you up.
We tend to not bother with this theologies perhaps it get bad press. Misunderstood teachings not accepted. When we deconstructed these passages got left back in vaults of our Biblical understanding.
But l suggest we haven't attempted to try think this area through correctly. Nor have we discussed regular. It's like it got left on roadside as our spiritual journey moved away
There are Dark forces at play, mischief, menace, problem making, distraction incidents. Missed meetings. Slothish behaviour, laziness, indiscipline.
Those areas are where spiritual. For you forces are working. Examine routes recently taken.
Someone not new to Faithfulness.
Read around the scriptures.
There is a light that never goes out.
One where we can always go, no offertory, few words, lots of couler, beauty, images narrative of breeze's.
Bird sounds, water lapping along edge. Coulers of 'ewe green, misty brown, dark indigo, yellow'. Smell of 'pine smell of suns hot rays ,grass smell of yellow pollen.Pine cones coming to bud.' As summer is arriving.
It's living breathing sermon. Daily display, free and walk there often.
Sadness accompanied me today. Only 6 months ago in last warm days of Autumn we walked as family. Pushing gently, Son in his wheelchair. that last summer autumnal evening. Returned to our dwelling sat eating, talking sharing.
Pondered, reflected about God's Nature and season to come. Our last time among wildlife we for decades have worshipped. When left Gods great local Cathedral in Nature. I didn't know you would journey away. God bless Champ.
Could feel you all around. Getting used to getting used to, you not being here. It's hard some days.
Church so long tonight.
Again one man show,
Man admitted likes solitude
Not Good with small talk.
But enjoys talking in Public, self spiritual masturbation, enjoys Position of Power.
Learnt awful lot about himself.
Used Word assuredly 4 times.
Watched play School when he was 3.
Bored and boring, unsure if other 6 people in Church tonight felt like me.
There is in the sacred something about PEACE and reflection something further about examination of your internal, (Spiritual) being. Find myself drawn into thinking about actions, words spoken, People dialogued plus encounters with.
It may sound deep. l make no apology for that. Sometimes its just about chasing down a track of music and having a cup of tea.
Sometimes its deeper, its also about the sitting, thinking on your own. Spending time in a place which allows space to be evident. OR it may be in your own home quietly on your favorite comfy seating area. Alone.
We fear sometimes being alone. But its the fabric that l come back to. The element of being in your own Space. Thinking, reflecting, seeking Balance.
Seek and Find. Listen.
Well, Matthew you never got the chance to grow old son. Sorry we no longer walk in nature, so missed your knowledge yesterday. Couldn't identify a birdsong. Your not here Matthew to repeat it's call, Nor describe it's migration, arriving and departing.
Presently preparing your memorial service.
Trying to get sense, How you'd like it. Not something l prepared for. Always believed. Always hoped,wanted you to get well.
Kind of thought..."you would stay forever Young.".. while this at times 'intolerant old git.' Would just pass away. Sunshine how l feel you. Generous soul loving wildlife,some music,6 coffees to start the day. Reading and watching classic TV as you wrote and draw pictures.
Your world now l hope is carried in sunshine. Mines still got few fears. LIFE which includes part of the fabric, DEATH.
We don't have to face these or any challenges alone, may find, there are people and unknown resources available to help us through challenge. Please look, be spiritual and accept help.
TRIED TO DO IT MY WAY, DETACHED STRONG GUY WAY, but very important to understand when things become too much. The Weight to heavy to carry.
SOMETHING l am not good at. People will avoid challenging issues/stuff...because it is difficult. Uncomfortable, emotions,actions, relationships are all complex, demanding, drain us emotionally. I was in my mid 40th before understood how this baggage was physically demanding.
All that coping. In itself it's challenging. When you spend time wrestling, even in your own mind ,your own spirit, thinking analysis,you start to shake own emotional development. It can, also does with some, impact LIFE you live.
Always do for others,
Let others do for You. Dylan.
Suppose today with Sun shinning Beaches full. Hope did rise. Briefly.
That stuff of beauty,
That stuff to do with creation.
Walking along path near River
Stuff about emotions, last night's conversation.
Cups of tea and chips.
Tiredness ,ill health, energy of young.
Sudden memory of you.
All this living element called LIFE
Love is not its own reward, it's dark shadow that creeps in when it wants too. Disturbs and disappears.
Love is with the creator of the starfields . It's in natures creation,plus time spent with all others.
Love is all sorts of people,all sorts of places, all sorts of music,films, experiences and remains nearby at all times.
SO WE MAY FOLLOW UP MY OWN WORDS INTO ACTIONS.
Keep us, Lord, from putting rules before righteousness, policies before people. Fix our attention and our ambition on the justice of your kingdom, the priorities of your heart. Keep us always mindful of your image, met in every person we encounter; help us to love.WOW that gets an amen from myself plus the need for a reflection to make sure l am following this prayer.keep some safe, empathetic, Jesus-loving people in your life while you’re holding onto Faith and Doubts, while talking, arguing, Cup of tea, clifftop walking, Hold others close too. But keep the faith with many who are also keeping the faith.
Anybody voting...call me cynic but gonna pass again...that's 66 years since last voted
Usually the word politeuma is related to Greek city states or poleis. In this context politeuma can mean “government,” “citizenry,” “polity,” or “state,” or, as a technical term, it can refer to the body of citizens who had political rights.1 The Ptolemies seem to have adopted the word politeuma and transferred it to a specific form of association which was apparently destined for organized groups of persons living within an urban area.
Huge winds brought chills waves and stormy conditions Despite this turmoil Got dressed, got out Excitement conversation's Pictures and...
